Go Back to Your Core

Go back to your core beliefs. You need to cheer for YOU. Beliefs are the key to unlocking all of our dreams. When you get an inspiration of what your life 'could be', you go to your beliefs first typically, and you can see what is stopping you. You can design your life in order to achieve greatness. You can change your beliefs , or you can get back to them to shape your program, that will serve you well. See what your beliefs are? Can you write them down? If it's not suited to you any longer, replace it with something better! 

~Jedi

What is your LEGACY?

Blog Feb 24

This morning I was recalling the first week I started my healthy eating and exercise program. I'm gonna let it all hang out (as it was by the way!) and share some of those thoughts.

It's been said, "Confusion is what happens just before you understand." That is how I was the first few days I was doing PiYo and 21 Day Fix. 

My coach told me to read over my booklet, but did I do it ? No! I didn't even understand that the PiYo package had a calendar, and I was supposed to follow that. I flew by the seat of my pants those first days, grabbing some meal ideas from my friends who were on it in the group, and probably IMed my coach several times that week. 

But the good news is that by asking lots of questions in my group, I learned! I expanded my arsenal. I finally figured out the benefit of writing down my meals, and using the Beachbody website as a source for interesting meals too. 

I enjoyed seeing my fitness friends (new and old) accomplishing their mini-goals. I clung to those pictures. I clapped. I hooted when someone announced they had broken their plateau. I cheered when they had dropped their 1st five pounds or that 1st inch, or even a milestone of 60 lbs, or 100. 

I had no expectation going in. In fact I "assumed" it would not work, but I had nothing to lose. And heck, I'm innately social. I was banking on a miracle. 

All I knew was that I decided I was tired of worrying about my thyroid. I was exhausted from stress.  I was sick of feeling bloated and getting nowhere. My stomach has seriously been bloated probably my whole life. My mother always had it too. I just assumed it was some hereditary issue. I had so many pants that were getting tight and looked 'silly'. Who wants to wear a big sweater, so you can hide the unbuttoned button or undone snap?

I was falling asleep midday and slamming coffees with half and half. I'd try eating salads for a few days, but then I'd eat a huge pasta Alfredo. My husband and I would pop chocolate in the evening after dinner. I'd drink water every once in a while, but not nearly as much as I do now.  We'd have wine on the weekend. Neither of us were really working out. He'd go mountain biking once a month. Ok, so? 

He had a gym membership that he used 4 times in one year. I was doing yoga 1 day a week for 1 hour. That's it. I could barely squeeze that it. I enjoyed it, but it wasn't necessarily 'helping' me to feel healthy or drop this weight. It did calm me a little for work on the day I did it, so I hung onto it. 

No matter what I did I didn't drop a single pound. 4 years after having my daughter, same weight post breastfeeding. Not "overweight," surely. But not toned, not healthy, not solid, not slim. Just 'not overweight' and fortunately 'tall'.

In fact when I hit 40, as the books would predict, maniacal laugh, I saw a few pounds even go up. Then I just said "$&@? This must be how it happens. This is what my mother used to say." Keep in mind my mother was always overweight. At her worst she was about 250, and had to shop in the larger section for full-bodied women (her phrase).

So one day this Sept when I realized I would not have my mother anymore in the future, (I sensed the end was coming), I just said to myself:

 "Do you want to gamble?" 

"Will you just be complacent and let either Parkinson's or perhaps colon cancer take you at some point"? "Will you be ok with leaving behind to your children just an ordinary history?" 

"Will they eat unhealthy?" 

"Who will guide them?" 

"What kind of model are you?" 

"What is your legacy beyond your 'work'?" 

That's right. I'm successful already. I've achieved so much professionally, but that pales in comparison to my health. Wouldn't you agree? 

My mom is gone. I want to leave a health legacy. A 'me' who is around for a long time, so I decided to take a leap and change it. 

And so began my week #1 of confusion before I understood :)

Sink Your Teeth In

I was forced to create a 'personal mantra' and a 'power phrase' in my course I'm taking with fitness leader Chalene Johnson. I thought I was done with homework, but maybe not!

I found this exercise very helpful though because it can be my go-to-reminder when things are getting rough in my life. 

I'm going to share mine, but then I encourage you to create your own. It has to be uniquely yours, and should not be too long. The power phrase is just that - a phrase. 

(you might recognize portions of this from my PiYo Jedi business page)

"Go where my SELF takes me. Trust the gifts the universe gave me.  Share carefully, but generously. Remember my roots, but stretch even higher."

Power phrase: 

"Sink your teeth in."

When I was a little girl, I was passionate about things. I had a knack for seeing things through. I loved starting a project and then giving it my best. I have no idea where this came from. Maybe it's in my blood! But my father always said 'when you sink your teeth in, you sure don't let go, do you'. 

I need a reminder when negative thoughts are getting in the way, and life is trying to derail me from what I need to get done for my dreams, that I need to 'sink my teeth in,' with that same tenacity my Dad remarked on. 

What's yours?

Tall Girls Carry It Well

Tall Girl Fitness

You've heard it all:

'You're so tall and beautiful' (by the way, notice how the 'tall' adjective always comes first)

'Did you play basketball in school?' (Nope, can't dribble to save my life)

'You carry yourself so well' (As opposed to what? Did you expect me to be bent over from the weight?) 

'You must be able to reach things easily?' (Yea, like that 2 year old matzoh hidden in the upper reaches of our kitchen cabinets)

'Is your husband tall too'? (No, I decided to marry a little person)

'That's not fair, you have more plank leverage ' (in regards to working out- yea, but you can crunch better with your tiny torso!)

'Are you a model?' (No, but I play one on TV?')

'How do you find shoes?' (You don't; can you say #catalogshopwhore

Here are some of the issues I've encountered with being a fit tall one:

I love how when I show my before and after picture to people they are impressed and happy for me of course, but then there's always that one person who asks 'Why did you lose weight? You were thin before.' 

I feel like responding 'yes when you're the size of an Amazon, you tend to take up more space vertically, so your eye focuses on that - it's like one of those Las Vegas illusionist shows. ' 

If you stick a tall 40 year old 15-20 lb overweight women next to a tiny 40 year old 5' 0" 20 lb overweight woman, the pixie will be able to get away with far less! Sorry ladies. 

Maybe that's what they meant by saying 'you carry yourself well' but it should be you carry your BODY FAT well. Can you imagine someone saying that? 

Also at my height who's able to see my shaking, undeveloped biceps anyway. You can't even see my little breasts which are desperately saying 'no, no weight loss please!!' You're only at the level of staring straight ahead into my soft ab-less torso. 

All I had to do was throw on some tight size 12 jeans and hide the unbuttoned button/zipper with a lose fitted shirt, and throw on some heels and dang, all they saw was LEG. Take a pixie with cottage cheese legs and stretch her out like on stilts and see what you get ! Illusionist! 

So yes, tall overweight girls have it in the bag. Oh, we work those tricks because we have the advantage of always looking down on you. 

But that doesn't change how we feel about ourselves confidence wise. 

Tall girls can't 'borrow' friends clothes when they gain OR lose weight. And then friends wonder why I saved all these outfits that didn't fit in hopes of getting back my 'high school body' back. One pant leg would be like a Capri - come on! 

My high school body . Ah! The 'only' aspect I loved about being tall and slender in school. Why?

Tall girls get picked last in gym class teams. 

Tall girls don't get asked to the prom

Tall girls have to always stand in the back

Tall girls don't try out for cheerleading (who can lift them?)

Tall girls can order at the bar though I guess, but that might explain the cottage cheese 20 years later! Darn. 

So in short when someone asks me why I lost weight I say 'because I grew tired of staring down at you.'

~Jedi

(P.S. That is my grandfather in the photo. Now you know where I get the 'verticality' from)

Growth From the Inside

Learning to be friendly

I would venture to guess that if I surveyed my friends, asking them if they judged me to be a warm, friendly person or rather an unfriendly , withdrawn individual, they'd pick the former. Am I right friends? But then I pondered whether my behavior with those who already 'know' me is a worthy measure . How about those who don't know me yet ? A stranger on the subway, the person ahead of me on the checkout line, the elevator operator at my home subway station , or my new client who didn't get the privilege of growing up with me, who doesn't know a thing about me except for that I promise to deliver, to lead them to a healthier body and mind. 

Just to be transparent I am by nature an introvert. But I adore people. I just need to take it in doses and when I reach my maximum, those who know me well , know I will retreat to a quiet corner and 'think'. Oh I am the master introspection queen! That might explain how I survived my PhD program. 

I love to think, examine, ponder, create, and dream. I am the silent toiler. In for the long haul. I enjoy listening to others and gathering a gestalt view of who they are. Because I see the goodness in so many of those I encounter. At gatherings and parties, I don't mind being the ring master and gathering the troops , and I'll do that with flair, but then like a classic introvert , I need to rest and reflect. 

So back to how I 'appear' to others who do not yet know me. I have become very in tune with how much more frequently and with genuine warmth I have started to have conversations with people, to smile more, to inquire of others with no particular agenda at all, but to simply show care for another. I can actually 'feel' myself being more friendly and open. And I find this shocking because I assumed I was like this all the time. 

The master introspect-er has in fact met her match: me. 

I believe she has even learned to grow. The more open I become, the more I want to lead and to think this all started with just a small investment : the cost of little more than a month's worth of coffee and muffins . 

This morning I had a lovely conversation with a young man on the subway. He didn't know me. But I made him smile, rather than frown. 

~Jedi

Entitlement vs Investment

I'm going to comment about entitlement versus investment.

Those who have me already as a Coach know I talk often of 'investment'. Right from the beginning I explain to clients that regardless of which balanced eating option you choose in your package when you sign on, you're signing on to a new commitment, a new routine, a new mindset, but never a 'diet'. Never a 'quick fix' (and no pun intended on our most successful 21DayFix!).

 There is no speaking of 'I can't have --' or 'Can I eat?' 

If you think about it, we all have free will do choose and do as we see fit in that day. I never look ahead at a day and think about what I 'can't' have or do. I personally look at how I'm going to 'invest'. I want to invest my palate, my time, my pleasure in a food that will give me the most bang for my buck. I want my brain fed and my liver untaxed. Make sense? So the high fee, low interest rate these days is: SUGAR. 

Without boring you with all the negative effects of sugar, just go listen to any number of JJ Virgin's podcasts or simply google sugar effects on the internet (not to mention substantiated, academic/scientific research on it). I choose my investments wisely and some could argue that's why I'm more successful with my eating and exercise than another who is not considering their investment. 

 I also think understanding investment relates to how you view 'entitlement'. This idea that I should 'get something for free.' People complain about their company not giving them enough or the government not doing enough. And in fitness, perhaps the program not giving them enough. I listened to a podcast recently where the guest speaker asked listeners to consider adopting an 'attitude of gratitude.' 

Sometimes I get the question as to why programs cost. You have to invest in yourself and keep reinvesting . It takes sweat, time, and yes, some money. 

When I think back to my childhood and into adulthood, see many cases where I could have easily wished for a magic wand to give me the instant gratification. I didn't want to have to draw the outline, submit a proposal, do the warm-up, collect the twigs for the fire, go through the contractions before they brought that damn epidural, do the angst before the divorce, but without the struggle, without the progress I would have not known myself. I would not have felt accomplished. Frankly the magic abs don't interest me. Yes, I have no shame to say on some nights I commend myself on my good work at pushing myself, of making my goal because I depended on ME. I towed the line and I can reflect with pride and courage that I did it. 

I look at my grandparents and my parents - generations who toiled for often prolonged periods of no reward, yet they revealed in their success later. They had no support network in most cases; they depended on sheer will and trust and they 'bettered' themselves. My grandfather in fact told my mother and her brother (in German) when they were growing up, 'better yourself'. It was a key phrase in the family. 

Entitlement doesn't belong with investment. Investment is a trade- off that you do in the spirit of bettering yourself. When you know the roots came from you, not handed down to you for free, you stand taller on them. 

Invest. 

~ Jedi 

Endorphins for the Road

Meeting up with various people today in my daily workplace, at the local cafe, on the train, at the pharmacy, I couldn't help but notice a common theme: stress. 

Two at least responded 'It's going', when asked 'How's it going?' These were people who knew me by the way. Not strangers. So everyone is stressed. The guy at the cafe told me about how he starts his college assignments late at night after working until almost 10:00pm here. A colleague tells me they find their work space annoying. My friend says she can't find time to exercise and her son's fussy habits are testing her nerves. A business associate complains about the commute and poor infrastructure. Sprinkled in among the complaints are a few people - they happen to be clients of mine who are working various eating and exercise programs, the ones with scary names like P90x and PiYo. Sounds like a virus out of that Brad Pitt zombie movie, right? Now there's no science behind what I'm blogging here- pure anecdotal notation, and I'm not trying to convince you of anything this evening, just simply sharing one day's observation.

So this handful of clients of mine still mention things that could qualify as stressors, but they're talking about it with a smile on their face! Are they on drugs? In a sense - yes. It's called endorphins and a clean gut. 

They scheduled a workout, maybe all or some checked in with me, or someone, about getting it done , and they're pushing through the day on more than just coffee . I'm going to call this 'coping'. 

Here I was marveling at the attitude spectrum of these individuals who were facing stress, yet managing because they had stuck to a clean plate and gotten in some exercise during the day. And then I came to me. I had ended up with a smile on my face in the morning too. How this was is difficult to imagine. 

I'm sure you can commiserate with being a working professional, pounding the keyboard tray, talking on the phone, sitting with your back rounded, maybe not even getting up to eat or take breaks properly

. 

Can you remember a day that was so stressful you thought you couldn't withstand another moment? That you could barely get a proper breathe in? A day where it took every molecule of chutzpah left running through that beat up shell of a bean counter to get to work?

I was one of these happy idiots as you might call it - smiling and cheerfully greeting people I knew in the morning, talking as I did on the way. I even started envisioning a positive conversation before it ever occurred! I had survived the night before, one of intense emotional fire storm from what I'll term the ' dark side' - the energy vampires, another colleague calls these 'bank robbers' .

I still turn to my body in the morning, I face towards what I know, what I can do. I can plank, grunt, throw a punch, squat, sweat, split, sprint, jump, and I can eat right. I can fuel up and do another round. But not sleepwalking through the day. I'm still shell- shocked from the night's conflict before, but the beauty of home base in the morning, it's enough to give you goose bumps. I know now it's love of yourself. It's leaning on yourself. It's getting intoxicated in your own analgesics. The perception of pain is lessened. 

Love in the solitude of your workout room. Endorphins for the road.

Why everyone wants to 'beat the Boss'

From the desk of Jedi

This last challenge group I organized and led in December of 2014, "Fitness Rebels" left me inspired and positive as I stepped foot into 2015. 
Not only did I create a dream board of how I want to grow as a coach, but I envisioned "mini-dream boards" for each of the people I help to tone up, lose weight, feel confident, learn healthy habits, become models of their own. I pictured conversations, photos, triumphs, laughs, goofiness and play, set-backs, and pain. 

This is why change takes a "village", a mission, a commitment to failure, in order to build back up. No one should walk alone. And you won't.

My new Fitness Coaching group is called Beat the Boss, and started on Jan 2, 2015. It was launched on the premise that a Boss 'leads'. Since I was doing a new exercise program of which I was not experienced and assumed I would not excel in, I entrusted my challenge with my clients. I challenged them to get down on the floor with me, or perhaps just watch the Boss fail. Because after all who wouldn't enjoy watching their leader, their coach get silly, fail, maybe even succeed. Since then it has grown to include more women and men, and we are pushing each other onward and upward, into new fitness challenges. 


If you are interested to get a sneak peek at what my accountability group is like, message me and I am happy to have that conversation.

~Jedi

Start Fresh - Measure in Seconds

From the desk of Jedi: 

Each of us might come from a different background which has contributed to shaping our beliefs about food. Maybe a product of the 60s...70s...80s...90s. Each era had it's own ideas. 

Do you remember when you were made to drink castor oil? Avoid certain dyes in candy? Told that only fat free was good? Don't eat coconut? Egg yolks raise your cholesterol? That fruit and vegetables are in the same group? Non-GMOs...organic ... Shop your local farmer's market...Stop eating carbs... Veganism all the way... I could go on.

Our relationship with food is influenced from many sides. And our families played a hand as well: maybe we were told to finish our plate, that we were 'big-boned', that Mom finished off whatever we didn't eat, that we hurried to get to our next appointment, that your sister could get seconds, but not you, that salt was bad for Dad, that chips and soda are normal to get at a rest-stop, that you're a 'fatty'.

Whatever "tape" still plays in your head, I ask you to just consider this: today is the start of openness, of forgiveness, of a gentler you. 

Milestones are reached second by second. There's a new way to measure change. Yesterday I exercised and maxed out at 7:08. Today I made it to 9:52. I simply 'tried' and grew.

Change is measured in seconds, not leaps and bounds.